Category: funny

Lizard News – Sore loser, CIA pretends to be more loyal to Trump administration than Trump himself!

Weeks after laptop ban on flights from the Middle East, US intel agencies seems to think nobody could have guessed it was about weaponized laptops.

CIA thinks that this info, passed on to US by the coy ISIS sponsor Israel, is too secret to be revealed by the US president to the Russian government!

So, “unknown sources” in the “intelligence community” contacted fake news outfits such as CNN and Reuters with the “information” that Donald Trump had “leaked” intelligence info to the damned Ruskies. Anxious to protect their intel “sources”, these idiots had to contact their stringers in the media. Oh, the vanities of the deluded! Isn’t this a clear case of someone other than the king trying to be more loyal than the king?

Each fakes news outlet went about repeating the talking points as if it was their own exclusive scoop.

This is pathetic, CIA. It seems that you are running out of ideas. You suck!

Donald Trump is the president. Get over it.

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Lizard News – Bill Clinton’s debut novel is “President Is Missing” – Missing what? Bimbos?

The Hilly-Billy Clintons should take a well-deserved break from politics.

Billy: “My new book’s title is ‘The President Is Missing.'”

Hillary: “Missing what, you moron? Bimbos like Monica Lewinsky?”

Bill Clinton’s new book “President Is Missing” gets a frosty reception from Hillary.

Why FBI’s Comey was fired by Donald Trump

“Yes, we will investigate if Russia had inappropriate contacts with Trump team. Hillary Clinton’s private server was… …only carelessness. We let her lawyers delete emails & smash her Blackberry devices. But, there was no criminal intent. So, I pronounce her Not Guilty!”

Clinton cheerleader Comey, clear out your desk.

Silly reasons Hillary Clinton thinks why she lost to Donald Trump – X

“Donald Trump is racist, xenophobic and misogynist… Well, that became the mainstream media dope only after Donald Trump went rogue with Mexican wall bomb. Until then, the media was like forever running stories of how untrustworthy I was.”

Even the mainstream media did not like me until Trump decided to go rogue with his Mexican wall.

Silly reasons Hillary Clinton thinks why she lost to Donald Trump – VI

As for the others, less said the better. Although Donald Trump supporters are racist, they voted Obama for two terms. Obama supporters wouldn’t vote for a rich white woman, which is why he is right when he says Americans are racists.

Democrats are racist. They did not vote for a rich white woman.