This story has been published in TheSpoof.com. It was written in response to a search for Saddam Hussein clad only in his underwear and washing his laundry which sent a visitor to the HUMOUR section on 20/05/2005.
Saddam Hussein has decided to drop his suit against the Rupert Murdoch-owned The Sun, his lawyer said today. As part of the settlement, the former Iraqi strongman will feature in the next season of the riches-to-rags reality series The Simple Life on Fox Television. Like The Sun, Fox Television is part of the worldwide Murdoch media empire.
On Friday, The Sun shocked the world by publishing a front-page picture that showed Saddam, only in white briefs, folding a pair of trousers. The publication of the photos had prompted a U.S. military investigation and condemnation from the Red Cross and Amnesty International. The Sun responded to the criticism by saying that a tyrant deserved no sympathy. Although The Sun is Britain’s leading newspaper by circulation, it is still best known for its Page-3 nudes and Man Enters Cage And Bites Monkey kind of stories.
The humiliated former Iraqi leader threatened to sue the British tabloid. On Sunday, his chief lawyer Ziad al-Khasawneh, speaking from Jordan, said, “We will sue the newspaper and everyone who helped in showing these pictures. Sure, Saddam was a tyrant. But then, isn’t Rupert Murdoch a war-monger, a scourge of our times. What sort of humiliation should he be subjected to?”
Today, however, both parties seemed to have reached an amicable settlement. Mr. al-Khasawneh said that Saddam had decided to drop the suit. Johnny Headpin, a spokesman for Fox Television in New York, said that Mr. Saddam Hussein and one of his former mates will replace Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie in the hit show The Simple Life. A new leading cast has become necessary, as Paris and Nicole have split and are no longer friends.
“The photo controversy provides the right amount of publicity to preempt the next season of our show. It will have the same effect as the Paris Hilton sex tape,” Mr. Headpin said. In November 2003, a steamy video of Ms. Hilton with her ex-boyfriend Rick Salomon sprouted like fungus all over the Internet and provided an unexpected but welcome boost in viewer interest for the Fox tv show.
Fox Television still has not decided on who would be Mr. Hussein’s buddy in the show. Current frontrunners are Ali Hassan al-Majid a.k.a “Chemical Ali” and former Iraqi Vice-President Taha Yassin Ramadan. The show will be shot exclusively in the Baghdad prison Camp Cropper, where former regime members are kept in solitary confinement.
Before the war, Saddam Hussein spent his time among his many Presidential palaces. His offices were typically furnished with Napoleon-era furniture. He used to drink $2000-a-bottle Napoleon-era brandy and smoke expensive Davidoff cigars. Interestingly, the former U.S. Ambassador for Iraq Paul Bremer appropriated the furniture, brandy and cigars for his personal use.
This article was published in TheSpoof.com.
Iraqi state television announced yesterday evening that U.S.
President George W. Bush has been elected the new Iraqi president.
Bush will be taking over from the former “interim” President Ghazi
In a Yes-or-No vote conducted last week, the current U.S.
President is said to have won an overwhelming victory to become the
Iraqi President. Even though the country was suffering from record
unemployment and gross mismanagement of the economy, Bush had reminded
the voters that their lives were safe only if they voted Yes.
The Yes-or-No elections were pioneered by the country’s former
dictator Saddam Hussein, who won each time they were conducted. There
was only one candidate in these elections and Iraqi people typically
Prior to the election, President Bush was made an honorary Iraqi
citizen by the “interim” Iraqi parliament on the advice of the
“interim” Prime Minister Iyad Allawi. There were disturbances in
several places in Iraq today after the news was announced. Prime
Minister Allawi warned people to stay at home. He told the media that
protesters would be carted off to the Abu Ghraib Freedom™ Prison and
given Freedom™ executions.
International reactions to the announcement was muted and many
nations were still trying to comprehend the situation. But, Zimbabwean
President Robert Mugabe was the first world leader to congratulate
President Bush. He said that Bush had always been an “inspiration” to
Third World leaders like him.
When Bush met reporters in Washington, he said that the Nazi-style
Republican Party convention held in New York last week did not yield
the kind of boost he had expected in the opinion polls. Hence, he
decided to gain tactical advantage by becoming Iraqi President ahead
of November elections. Bush said that his action would help the war
against terror and make America “more safe”. More important, he said,
Kerry would be unable to match him now.
As Iraqi President, Bush said he would invade neighboring Kuwait
and Saudi Arabia. He said he was not interested in their oil wealth,
but wanted to establish democracy in these countries. Bush promised he
would eventually give Kuwait back Kuwaitis and Saudi Arabia back to
- Congratulations for the great story, it’s very funny. Despite the humorous sense it reflects the thoughts of the third world’s countries, like Brazil, about the USA government and its international politics. – From a friend in Brazil.
- You have written very well. You should also have mentioed U.S. Economy will have a better type of improvement snce Bush left the U.S. to take the presidentship at Iraq. Well Done. Ur name ‘Moral Volcano’ is superb da. I am proud of you. – From a friend in the U.S.