Bush Becomes Iraqi President Ahead Of US Elections

This article was published in TheSpoof.com.

Iraqi state television announced yesterday evening that U.S.
President George W. Bush has been elected the new Iraqi president.
Bush will be taking over from the former “interim” President Ghazi
Yawer.

In a Yes-or-No vote conducted last week, the current U.S.
President is said to have won an overwhelming victory to become the
Iraqi President. Even though the country was suffering from record
unemployment and gross mismanagement of the economy, Bush had reminded
the voters that their lives were safe only if they voted Yes.

The Yes-or-No elections were pioneered by the country’s former
dictator Saddam Hussein, who won each time they were conducted. There
was only one candidate in these elections and Iraqi people typically
voted Yes.

Prior to the election, President Bush was made an honorary Iraqi
citizen by the “interim” Iraqi parliament on the advice of the
“interim” Prime Minister Iyad Allawi. There were disturbances in
several places in Iraq today after the news was announced. Prime
Minister Allawi warned people to stay at home. He told the media that
protesters would be carted off to the Abu Ghraib Freedom™ Prison and
given Freedom™ executions.

International reactions to the announcement was muted and many
nations were still trying to comprehend the situation. But, Zimbabwean
President Robert Mugabe was the first world leader to congratulate
President Bush. He said that Bush had always been an “inspiration” to
Third World leaders like him.

When Bush met reporters in Washington, he said that the Nazi-style
Republican Party convention held in New York last week did not yield
the kind of boost he had expected in the opinion polls. Hence, he
decided to gain tactical advantage by becoming Iraqi President ahead
of November elections. Bush said that his action would help the war
against terror and make America “more safe”. More important, he said,
Kerry would be unable to match him now.

As Iraqi President, Bush said he would invade neighboring Kuwait
and Saudi Arabia. He said he was not interested in their oil wealth,
but wanted to establish democracy in these countries. Bush promised he
would eventually give Kuwait back Kuwaitis and Saudi Arabia back to
Saudi Arabians.

COMMENTS:

  1. Congratulations for the great story, it’s very funny. Despite the humorous sense it reflects the thoughts of the third world’s countries, like Brazil, about the USA government and its international politics. – From a friend in Brazil.
  2. You have written very well. You should also have mentioed U.S. Economy will have a better type of improvement snce Bush left the U.S. to take the presidentship at Iraq. Well Done. Ur name ‘Moral Volcano’ is superb da. I am proud of you. – From a friend in the U.S.